The Red Diaries: Chapter 3

THE RED DIARIES

Chapter 3

A li'l something to entice you!

Before you start reading today's chapter; I would really appreciate it a lot if you'd check out my instagram account. Then you can decide whether you wanna follow me or not, the link to my account is right here: https://www.instagram.com/22_leah_/. Thank you for making my day. Now grab a glass of lemon water or just water and read on!When you have depression, you don't really wanna do anything right? You feel tired all the time and you just wanna go to bed.  Well, my depression story is a little different. I invested myself into work because that gave me an escape from the miserable hell that was my life. This was because I had Active-depression, which essentially means that you fulfil your social responsibilities like working, communicating with people if that is a part of your "job" etc. However, once you are finished with this work, you don't feel like doing anything and you avoid socialising with other people including your family. However, if y'all live in the same house, you are bound to cross paths with them, although, you do avoid contact as much as you can. This is a reason why active depression is hard to identify and people who have active depression are ignored. Active-depression is like a parasite, its harmful effects manifest slowly and it sorta feeds off of your weakness and negative energy.

Now, ☺️ don't get all sympathetic for me because in the coming chapters of "The Red Diaries", you'll probably find depression and anxiety... nice?! Don't worry, I'm not crazy 😉, tune in for coming chapters, ya'll see. Now that I've given you some context, let's move forward in time. 

-THREE MISERABLE MONTHS LATER-

Now the time came to go back to school and truth be told, I was psyched because and get this, I apparently thought that company would help heal my broken heart; well, what do ya know? I became worse, constantly looking over my shoulder, trying to avoid Miss Popular and her bullying group. See, I am the girl that'll stick up for the uncool girls, the padhako girls ( the nerds and geeks), the despised and the targeted girls. Therefore, I became a sore thumb, sticking out and became a target of indirect bullying or veiled bullying, so to speak (well, so to write in this case 😂). Mmmm... with bullying comes a booster, a booster for your anxiety, not so cool and fun. Anyways, I pulled through a tough school time and I became self-conscious; about my body and everything. I sense somebody yawning already... that's why I'll leave my story at this point. We'll continue later, the next episode is gonna be a lot more interesting, trust me.

See ya next time until then keep Living. Loving. Repeating.

I don't who this woman is... but I feel her, honestly.

You're BEAUTIFUL. I'm certain 😉

Something for ya, enjoy!

1. To help you feel better: You are goin' through a tough time rn, you can't accept yourself. But being an original you and flawed is better than being someone else and PERFECT. I love you so much for taking the time to read my musings!! You are well appreciated 🧚🏼‍♂️🧚🏼‍♂️🧕🏻.

😍 Listen to Shawn Mendes' If I Can't Have You  and feel good