Do You Want To Change?

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Why did you click on this post?? Simple question, yet mind boggling. You might be like yeah, what the hell, why did I click on this. Keep reading to find out. 

I'm going to tell you something about me. I CHANGED MY LIFE. The tables have been turned on life, which is always throwing curve balls my way. HOW, you may ask?? Simple, I lost to it and then got up to beat it down. Maybe you're feeling crappy right now, hoping some miracle would take place and help you out of some mess that maybe, you've created or you've been pushed into. Well, listen up honey, no miracle is coming your way, okay! Sorry to be real, but I spent a huge deal of time just waiting for this "miracle" to take place and make me happy; surprise! It didn't come. Nobody rescued me until I made up my mind on what I wanted to change or how I wanted to change myself. When I was depressed, I spent a lot of time in my room, alone and empty, vulnerable; despising myself and not taking care of my body, my health, hell even my soul. I didn't even care about anything, constantly wondering how soon would I depart from this realm and find peace ( I'm not encouraging this). But after a while I realised, I don't know if I really want to go. One day, I woke up and looked in the mirror, I was really sad but this time it was because I was confused as to what was I doing. What the hell was I doing and WHY WAS I DOING IT?? That day I made my bed, took a shower, prayed,  dressed up and made my hair. After a long, really, really... long time and what can I say, I felt A-M-A-Z-I-N-G. Yup! I smiled when I looked in the mirror. Well, then I picked up my diary and penned down a poem. I know this sounds like a reality show but trust me this was the first poem I ever wrote and its titled,'My Feelings: Anxiety'. ( if you wanna check it out, here's the link to the same:https://lifesitivity.blogspot.com/2019/03/my-feelings-anxiety_4.html). 

 Then I spent that day really productively. However, I did have a spiral after a few days. That day made me realise and I quote Selena Gomez, "Happiness isn't something you sit back and wait for". It's something you long for and try and grab the moment you get a chance to. If I could change my outlook on things going on in life, I promise you this, you can too. I'm not going to ask you to not worry and tell you that things are going to be okay. You have to WORRY AND MAKE THINGS OKAY, in fact, MAKE THINGS BETTER! Start small and grow. Start by simple things such as showering everyday, if you don't. Water helps me escape, it might work for you too. Or start by simply making your bed. You won't believe me but things like cleaning your room and decorating it or making your hair or dressing up can change your life. I can tell you these things helped me a lot. 

Magic bean: The thing which I'd probably suggest the most is put on your airpods, headphones, earphones and listen to either music or listen to an audio book or listen to calming beats or sounds you enjoy. GET COMFORTABLE TO STEP OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE. Go crazy! Go big! Take a walk to clear your head. Try and reflect, see where did things go downhill and what you'd do differently if you could go back. You're alive and healthy, hopefully, so why not start over. I created a new me and I love this new me. Create a person you love. I know you can.

Tune in for more motivation and until next time pies! Keep living. Loving. Repeatin'.